|There's a reason this BCBG |
travesty is on sale for $28.31.
It’s not the hockey hair of the eighties that pushes my buttons. It’s not that almost-mullet-Mrs. Brady-hair-that-sort-of-gives-me-nightmares that’s making me cringe. It’s the dreaded “Mullet Skirt.” I think it became a universally accepted opinion that the mullet as a hairstyle conjured images of all things redneck and was not “chic.” So, why would you emulate that in a garment?
I understand the practicality of having a skirt be somewhat longer in the back than in the front. Most people have more distance to cover from waist to knee in the back than the front – that whole ass thing can get in the way. Yet, that is just a calculation to be made so that the skirt is the same length in the front as in the back without daily tasks such as picking up the chocolate you dropped on the floor (which you are going to eat because it takes a good 30 seconds for germs to transfer from one surface to another) becoming R rated for those around you. I do not understand the desire to have the back of the skirt reach the Achilles tendon while the front of the skirt barely grazes the knee. Will someone please explain this to me?
|Urban Outfitters Fail.|
If anything, I would have thought that an asymmetrical skirt would have been long in the frontand short in the back. I like my calf muscles a lot better than I like my knees. “Hey look, everyone! Here are my knees and shins!” That’s what the mullet skirt says. So sexy. Low cut shirt – boobs. Daisy dukes – ass. Peep toe shoes – pedicure. KNEES?! Who wants to look at knees?! I don’t want to meet the sicko with a knee fetish. I don’t want to meet any sickos, actually, but I can only imagine what kind of weird person goes around fixating on people’s knees.
Ugh, I just found a Vogue Daily article touting the things because so many people are wearing them on the streets. A lot of people get gum stuck in their shoes too – that doesn’t mean you should do it. The article goes so far as to call this Urban Outfitters number a "stunner." Maybe like a stun gun. It’s the color of a Band-Aid and looks like it was cut right off the bolt at the JoAnn Fabrics.
|Here's an ugly red one from Macys.|
Can you just picture a small
animal or child pulling on the back?